One year and a week. That’s how much time has passed …
since the last time I saw my (IN)significant other as the man I married 6 years ago this July.
The way I saw him then is completely different than how I see him now. What changed you ask. A LOT! Actually, the only one thing that changed is me. I changed. I changed in how I “see” him, I changed in how I view life, and I changed in how, most importantly, I live my life.
It hasn’t been easy, by any stretch of the means. In fact, it’s been quite rough. But I made it through. I survived. And I came out better for it.
A year ago, I finally had enough of his bullshit and I kicked him out of my home. Enough of his lying, cheating, narcissistic, psychopathic ways.
I could write a book, which I am, on all the different ways he’s hurt me. If you’ve read any of my previous posts, you’ll know.
But the whole reason I started this blog was to let you know; you’re not alone and that if you put a little effort into “it”, whatever “it” is, you can make it in this world.
I decided to put my big girl panties on. I went back to school. And it was wonderful! I can’t even tell you why I did. I’m already a great writer, a published writer even! But I did it.
I was determined to get good grades. I achieved high A’s in both of my classes and as of this writing I will be starting class No. 3 in a day.
I had a vision.
When I decided to go back to school, I was a little lost. Ok, a lot lost. I didn’t know what I was going to do without this man in my life, without the income, without the person I thought I loved in my life.
But the strangest thing happened.
After finishing those 2 classes (and one was math, ugh!) I realized something.
For the first time in my life it didn’t matter that he wasn’t there. I DID it! I survived all his abuse. And I’m the one that came out better for it.
Would you like to know where he is in life? Homeless, supposedly no jobs and no friends. No life!
And on those days, when I feel sorry for myself or feel down in the dumps or want to crawl under a rock…
How wonderful my life truly is. I am so much better now than I was before. And even more than that,
I am so very grateful for all that I have.
And then it all clicked.